Saturday, August 30, 2014

Lesson 319: That's How We Roll


Hello, Readers!
Eloise has her eye on you!
I've been on the lookout for some things you may
 like to read about this weekend.


Lots of them are school related because it's
BACK TO SCHOOL TIME!


Ellen is happy because her artwork was chosen 
as the Junior High Agenda Book cover this year.



The end of the first full school week of the year
made way for the first home football game of the season tonight.

Teenage girls donning tutus were out in full force.


Sweetheart doesn't like my zoom.
Mothers of America:  the Canon SX50 = Spy ware


Natalie doesn't care a bit about my zoom.
She loves football games.


Tonight's match up was against our backyard rival,
the Iroquois Braves. 
Our communities have titled this game Battle of the Bridge,
signifying the Nagle Road bridge which connects our towns.


 Looks like we hold control of the bridge for another year.
Sam is setting up a toll booth:
Cars 50 cents
Bikes a buck

It was a Bridge Burner tonight.
Scoring back and forth, the game ended with a late, 4th quarter touchdown
resulting in a 39-35 win for the Huskies.

It felt funny not to scream at the old coach,
 the only coach of the Huskies I can ever remember.
He retired this year and there was a regime change.


The Iroqouis team was all heart, man.
#23 for the Braves was my favorite to watch.
They played a great game.



This was an interesting helmet on #58 for the braves.
Concussion protection, I presume.


There were even some ice bucket challenges at half time.


Now it's time to write this blog,
drink a couple of 33's,
and curl up with my favorite new book afterwards.

Yes, it's a kids' book.

&#^%^#&%&#

Did you hear that sound?
That was all of my male readers abandoning this blog post.

No worries, 
I'll get them back.

I'll just call Ulysses.
He'll help me.
Ulysses is a super hero.
And he's also a squirrel.



Flora rescues him,



and Ulysses does some really amazing things.
Holy Bagumba!



There's no better children's writer than Kate DiCamillo.
That's because she writes words like this.
Listen:



As much as I love Ulysses the Super Hero Squirrel,
EB Bear from Erie Bank is cuter,
and has Giant Ears.

EB is almost fourteen years old and her name rhymes with Smellen.



Since we're talking about learning,
one thing I learned recently is to never to give up hope.

Here are my five new cherry tomatoes,
which gives my garden yield a grand total of 6 this year.
I named them
Louie
Eloise
Natalie
Ellen
and Sam.



Speaking of growth,
here is something that is growing in popularity by the minute.



The Khan Academy was the brainchild of Salaman Khan,
born and raised in New Orleans, USA.


The Khan Academy offers to provide a
"free, world class education to anyone, anywhere"
via youtube videos on the internet, particularly in the areas of math and science.

Since I've explored this site and considered the vast opportunities there are to learn,
I've given up on the notion that
I,
Mrs. Eloise,
The Teacher,
must deliver the lesson in order for students to learn.

It is time for me to turn the students loose and see where things like this can take them.
Check out this motivational video about the Khan Academy below.

Feeling inspired after watching that video?
Good.
If you can LEARN anything,
than you can certainly DO anything.
All you need is the right frame of mind.

It was nephew Jack's birthday this week.


I got him this special Zombie Clown Apocalypse target.
I'm sure his mother will love it.
Kenyan is afraid of clowns.


She's also afraid of the power that my axe holds.

I've been putting fear factor posts on Kenyan's facebook wall for the past week.


Now we're down to only one week left until the big event.
My head games have to kick it up a notch.


It's time to take Sissy out of the race.


I've been taking my axe with me everywhere.
It's always at the ready when I leave the Lamp Post.


I brought it to Jack's birthday party to intimidate Kenyan and Grandma.


They were unfazed,
but it did make one heck of a cake cutter.


The rivalry between my team captain, Friend Krauza,
and the Beauties team captain, Sister Kenyan
is almost over.

Geez. 
Then what am I going to write about?
Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum sure do make for great blog fodder,
and photo ops.


The battles, 


kidnappings,



and harassment will end next week.


Or will it?


We'll see how my army of non conventionals 
stands up against Kenyan's super team of super fast runners.

Oh yeah,
the super fast runners
and Grandma.


No matter what the day brings, 
the Krazies will start and finish as a team.


And what does that mean exactly?
Starting and finishing as a team of 70 persons strong, 
would be difficult to go through a ten mile obstacle course hand in hand.

Our team is diverse, and has folks from a wide range of fitness levels.
Every athlete from the elite to the newbie has a strength and a weakness.

Some are fast runners on pavement.
Krazie Speed Demons,  I need you to run the front and keep up with Kenyan. 
She's a chicken shit when it comes to heights,
so stick with her to make sure she doesn't cheat.

Others may be slower than the front runners,
but have strong legs to carry them up hills of sand with ease.
I'll need your help if I lose my shoe.



Others have arm strength to maneuver ropes and monkey bars,


or to hoist my lard @$$ over an blue-green, ugly, metal box.


 It's inevitable you'll get to some part of the course that will cause a stumble.
And when you do, a teammate will be there to help you through it,


and encourage you to keep going.


And if your teammate finishes ahead of you,
they will wait for you in the end.


In my case, because I am always bringing up the rear,
you can go home, shower, take a nap, grab a Starbucks,
and meet me back at the finish for when I'm done.

I'd be much obliged.


Photo credit:  B Scott Feeney

Kenyan got her training video posted on Thursday for her team.
Back up a blog post if you missed it.

Tonight, it's our turn.
The Krauza's Krazies get the song 
The Outsiders by Eric Church.

That's how we roll.




Enjoy the video below, 
as well as your holiday weekend.

Eloise
XOXO

Thursday, August 28, 2014

Lesson 318: Beauties & the Beasts Pep Rally Video

The Barber Beast on the Bay is 8 days away!

Captain Krazy and Sister Kenyan were promoting the event 
on Erie radio this morning.


Behaving as usual.


Below you will find a goodwill gesture from the Krazies to the Beauties:
a Pep Rally video for the Beauties team, 
from Yours Truly,
Eloise.
XOXOXOX

You've been training long, hard, and mostly in the nude,
therefore you deserve your special moment in the blogosphere, too.

With only a little over a week until Go Time, you
may want to put in some extra training sessions.

My team, the Krazies, still holds the advantage,
 but not because of our small army of participants--
because of this axe.
It holds superpowers within it,
and as the oldest daughter in our family,
it makes me the rightful heir.


Best wishes to you and your fancy and fast team. 

See you on the beach next Saturday!

Eloise


Saturday, August 23, 2014

Lesson 317: School Rules


RRRRRRRIIIIINNNNNNNNGGGGGGGG!
Did you hear that, Readers?
That's the bell.
It's time for


Eloise is heading back to class for the 38th consecutive year.
Here I am in 1976.


After all these years spent in classrooms, I've picked up a few tips I'd like to share with you.
Welcome to the School Rules Edition of the Lamp Post.

In 1976, I attended Fred S Clark Elementary.  I now have the privilege of teaching there in 2014.  Clark School is closed for renovations this year and our whole Clark family has been relocated to a vacant school building in a nearby.  No one likes being away from what is known and safe, but we all will adjust to our new setting.
School Rule #1--Adaptation is key to survival.  


Klein School, another elementary building in my district, reopened its doors all fresh and new from its own recent renovations.  Here were the happy students returning for their first peek.  There is no place like home!


I guess that is why Dorothy and Toto greeted the happy children and passed out these pins.


School Rule #2--Be Appreciative of What You Have


My classroom has fresh paint, brighter lightning, updated electricity, and is climate controlled.
This is the view out my classroom door, into the hallway.
I think the universe is sending me a message:


Perhaps the key to academic success is good organization.

School Rule #3--Stay Organized!

Eloise will readily admit that I am not the most organized person by nature.
I'm not Born Organized like my mother.
I like clutter and work very well within it.
Grandma hates my refrigerator door.
I tell her it is an outward manifestation of my brain.


So is my purse.
It's in there, somewhere......


Still, being the creative type who can carry on well amid chaos,
is no excuse for poor personal management.
I recognize my tendencies, but put in place some strict rules to make myself functional.

For example, here are all the school materials I've collected over the last three days.


Do I leave them all in this giant heap, or make myself a manageable system?
Time will be spent this weekend creating an organizational binder.

Do I WANT to do that?
Heck, no!
Do I NEED to do that?
Hell, yes!

I also impose on myself strict routines during the work week:  
  • Put laundry away on Tuesday and Saturday
  • Lesson plans on Wednesday
  • Clean the house 5:00 am Thursday mornings
  • Grocery shopping Fridays
  • Family clean up Sunday nights 7:30
Sticking to a routine like this isn't exactly FUN.  However, running around my house searching for lost items or scrambling for the Xerox machine on Monday mornings isn't a picnic either.  

School Rule #4--Make Your Personal Accommodations!  
No excuses!

Good news of the week:
My cherry tomato plant showed some late promise!



Last week I ate Lady Sybil, my one and only cherry tomato from my garden, 
at the advice of my facebook friends.


I thought she'd be the only one of the season,
and felt sad eating her, hating the Very Small Tomato Party to come to and end.
I posted a What Should Eloise Do? post to facebook.

I got some really great advice from my friend Kira.

Kira Eat it, then more may appear‼️‼️


That's exactly what happened!
Your advice was spot on, Kira!

School Rule #5-- Never Give Up Hope

Hope was the theme of the week with the ALS Ice Bucket Challenges.



ALS or Lou Gherig's Disease is a degenerative neurological condition to which there is no known cure.


Awareness is raised through Walks,


and Rides.



The Ice Bucket Challenge has really brought attention to this dreadful, terminal condition.

Everyone jumped on the Zamboni and dumped ice to raise awareness.

NBC was on board as Today Show's Matt Lauer got the early morning chill down.


Former President George Bush volunteered to be a Freeze Pop.


Even Handsome Himself took off his black hat for a worthy cause.


School Rule #6--Take Action!

Eloise didn't get officially "called out."
 I did call out to my facebook friends to read this book though.
Tales from the Bed is an account of ALS through one of its victims.


School Rule #7--Educate Yourself!

I'm buffing up my axe for Barber Beast on the Bay.
Last year I slayed the beast with this dagger.


This year the beast is bigger and badder than ever, 
so I've stepped it up a notch.

I'm using my battle axe, an ancient family heirloom.
I, the Eldest Daughter, is the rightful heir.
My little sister, Kenyan, wants it, 
and wants it BAD!


I've caught her twice trying to break into the Lamp Post to steal it,
so Eloise moved the axe to safer locations for its protection.




Jealous Kenyan got an axe of her own.


It's purely intimidation, as this axe, although big
(and sharp)


does not hold the power that lies within my axe.
Eloise is not afraid.

School Rule #8--Have No Fear

Signed up for the Barber Beast, are ya?

So,
have the dreams started yet?
You know,
the ones where you are climbing mountains of sand,


 and running for miles on end.




Or how about the ones where you are scaling a high and unsteady apparatus?


I hate to tell you this, Teammates, 
but those nightmares are about to become real.
The Barber Beast can be daunting, but don't doubt yourself.

School Rule #9--Trust Your Training

You can do this!
We could!



And we did!


You can do this, too!

School Rule #10--Have Faith in Yourself!

The first bell rings on Monday morning, marking the unofficial start to the fall.  I am looking forward to the year to come and cannot wait to see all of the students.

The photos are very appropriately set to Caroline Pinnell's song, We Are Gonna Be Friends.  It's very schoolish.  My Teacher Peeps are gonna love it.  (Sorry--GOING TO love it).

Mrs. Eloise